How Many Calories in Sperm?

Hi everyone,

Barbra Novac here.

I had my cholesterol checked two weeks ago, and yup- You guessed it! Chronic fatal heart disease running through women and men on both sides of my family (I have a grandfather that dropped dead on a sports field at the age of forty) has caught up with me and my rank was a whopping 6.2. Maybe not danger levels, but a sharp rise from where it used to be, now that I am approaching the age when these things take hold.

Gripping my cell white knuckled and with my heart rate rising at an alarming rate, I phoned my father - the man who beat this hereditary disease and did all the long term research. He told me get onto the rice bran oil (not too much) and to consider doing the Atkins diet.

So, naturally, filled with the fear of an imminent demise, I am doing both. Which brings me, in a very long winded manner, to my point on the blog today.

With Atkins, you have to count your carbs and calories every day. I have no idea yet if my cholesterol is down, but I had another, rather startling revelation.

After an enjoyable bit of quality time with my husband, I wondered how many calories are in sperm? Had anyone done this calculation? Should I be writing it down and counting it as a part of everything else I have consumed in my day? Is it full of proteins and sugar? Most importantly of all, is it full of carbs? Here is some of what I gleaned from the ever helpful internet.

The actual amount of semen per ejaculation is 1 - 2 teaspoons. Number of calories per teaspoon is 7 (phew! It's on the diet!). Now 5% of this ejaculate is made up of sperm, and there are about 100 million per teaspoon full. This quantity is because the quality of sperm is very low, very few sperm are strong enough to actually fertilise an egg. The amount of quality sperm decreases dramatically as a man grows older.

The average amount of times a man will ejaculate in his lifetime is 7,200; 2000 times of which are likely to be from masturbation. In a lifetime he will ejaculate approximately 14 gallons of ... ejaculate. He will send all these teaspoonsful out into you or his hand at 28 mph. That's good , because to fertilise your egg, that little fella has to travel 3 to 4 inches and remember he's not that hardy! Once he gets there it will take him 2.5 seconds to fertilise that egg and change both of your lives forever. The sperm lives (from development to ejaculation) about 2 ½ months. A sexually active man will spend approximately $100 a year in condoms.

A man will have about 11 erections a day and nine of those will be while he is sleeping. His hormone levels are at their peak at dawn and dusk, which explains why he always wants to do it first thing in the morning and in the afternoon while you are fussing over homework and getting dinner ready. 60% of men claim they masturbate, 54% masturbate once a day, and a whopping 41% say they feel guilty when they do!

That's not the end of what I found, but it's the end of room for this post. I didn't end up finding the carb count, so I am going for zero, and keeping it deliciously on the menu!

Happy snacking!

Barbra

Barbra's book Double Crossed is available through Loose Id here. Look out for her new novel, Honest Masks due for release early February!
www.barbranovac.com