I just realized I have a blog due here today at Loose Id. This would not ordinarily be an unpleasant surprise, but I'm in the home stretch of completing Death of a Pirate King, the fourth book in the Adrien English mystery series about a gay bookseller and sometimes amateur sleuth, and his on-again off-again romance with a closeted LAPD homicide detective.
This is not a new story idea -- although when I first came up with it ten years ago, it was. And I have to say, I've reached the point where even I am bored with the number of amateur sleuths paired with closeted cops floating out there. So I thought I would do a post on Things I'm Tired of Reading in M/M Fiction. Feel free to join in on the comment section below
So here's a couple of the things I'm tired of reading in M/M Fiction.
1) Men who spend waaaaay too much time sitting around thinking about how they're feeling -- and worrying about how the other guy might be feeling. I mean, not that guys don't have feelings, and not that guys aren't self-analytical, but...Honest. To. God. I'd be worried about adolescent girls who spent this much time brooding over their love affairs.
Never mind whether it's realistic or not, it's BORING.
2) Men who can only swear to convey deep emotion. Since when did masculine become synonymous with Neanderthal? Not every guy has to turn into Brutus addressing the mob, but how about occasionally allowing for a little coherency on the part of your male protag. I mean...fuck...
3) Falling in love at first sight. This bores me in any and all romantic fiction. Lust is one thing. I think we've all experienced lust at first sight, but generally we know the difference, right? I get so bored by characters who are bowled over by each other at first sight -- a romance is an adventure story, and the journey is supposed to take up most of the story -- it's really the fun part -- NOT the scooping up the treasure troove of jewels at the end. So if there's no conflict, no journey, no story...what's the point?.
So, that's all I can think of at the moment -- Adrien is calling to me.
Agree Disagree? How about sharing some of your top peeves in M/M fiction?
33 comments:
One of my biggest pet peeves would have to be men who checked all their testosterone at the door. Oh and dialogue that NO ONE would ever say.
I read something once that had me laugh so hard I fell out of bed. I promptly got up and shared with my partner in crime. I told her if I ever had my character say anything like that seriously she could shoot me.
I agree on all counts. Male or female, sitting around pondering does he or doesn't he gets old to the reader.
My biggest pet peeve is when the narrator spends most of the time pointing out the fact that he's really basically straight, but he's just gay for this one special person. It's almost like he's apologizing for the aberration. It's annoying as hell.
My biggest pet peeve is when the narrator spends most of the time pointing out the fact that he's really basically straight, but he's just gay for this one special person.
You see that a lot in fan fiction -- and fan fiction is the breeding ground for M/M writers, so I guess it makes sense in a perverse way. Yes, the old Gay For You syndrome.
Highly entertaining.
But they had to explain how these heterosexual characters found their way into each other's arms, I guess.
Oh and dialogue that NO ONE would ever say.
I read something once that had me laugh so hard I fell out of bed.
God. Bad dialog is its own subject -- and Ring in Hell. Yes, that's a definite one.
The obligatory happily ever after. I don't like forced endings. I realize I'm reading a romance, but there's needs to be a a natural progression to the resolution and conclusion. I feel cheated when an ending feels "slapped on." Like the author left something out somewhere. Where the heck did they fall so madly, deeply in love. Maybe the story needs to be longer or a two-parter, but just don't stick on that HEA just because. LouisaClark
Where the heck did they fall so madly, deeply in love. Maybe the story needs to be longer or a two-parter, but just don't stick on that HEA just because.
Good one. It's not a successful happy ending if the reader doesn't believe in it.
I'm tired of the anti-gay lynch mob being the villain in most m/m books. Yeah, there are some fucktards out there, but not everybody is out to kill a twink. Find another antagonist to keep the tension going. The whole "everybody is out to get me" syndrome is becoming a boring cliche.
I have to say that one of the things that makes me want to throw a book out the window is when one of the guys becomes a teen-aged girl. Come on, how many men (gay or straight) do you know cry at the drop of a hat? Also, isn't curious how all these guys seem to have large "packages." When did it become a necesity in an erotic romance?
Also, isn't curious how all these guys seem to have large "packages." When did it become a necesity in an erotic romance?
I haven't been in erotic romance long enough to know -- but I did assume it was a common phenomenon in het romance as well. No?
The whole "packages" issue is one I really hate. It's so done. It's like always writing black male parts in het (and gay) romances where he has the biggest dick - that's their only attribute - forget intelligence.
I agree with the "crying at the drop of a hat thing". I once mentioned in a review the number of times that the gay characters cried and the author took me to task by inferring I had no soul and she stated that her characters were too "sensitive" and too "good looking for their own good" and went on and on about how one protag's father had abused him.
That's another one that really makes me want to gag - all the gay men who had to have been abused as a child, because the lifestyle must be explained away somehow since to say otherwise would be an aberration. That's my 2 cents worth.
I agree with the "crying at the drop of a hat thing". I once mentioned in a review the number of times that the gay characters cried and the author took me to task by inferring I had no soul and she stated that her characters were too "sensitive" and too "good looking for their own good" and went on and on about how one protag's father had abused him.
The crying thing is ridiculous -- not because real men don't cry, but because the author's apparently suffer from the delusion that being cry baby is an attractive thing in a person.
The only time crying is effective is when the tears come from someone who never cries. Then it means something.
Unless the point of the story is seeing this soggy dude develop a stiff upper lip -- but most readers are going to find that a tedious journey.
Weakness is not an attractive trait -- in men OR women.
I haven't been in erotic romance long enough to know -- but I did assume it was a common phenomenon in het romance as well. No?
Yes, you are right. There are size queens in every gender and genre but what drives me nuts is when every character in a given story/series being so blessed. Because, really how often do you find a groups of friends/acquaintances where all men are over 10" or whatever...
I hate when the book is nothing but the "treasure troove of jewels". Now, unless your point is to write porn on paper, you don't NEED to have detailed sex scenes every other page in it in order to get recognized.
Sure, a lot of fans of m/m like the smutty scenes, and I'm not excluded, but that doesn't mean you have to dumb down your plot and writing to just get more reviews/comments/etc. Or worse, feel like the only way you'll get comments is by adding smut.
If people only review you after smut, take a hint and try to improve the other parts of your writing.
too much sex, I think. I know that sounds hypocritical of me - and I love a good sex scene - but i've read so many books recently where the characters can't even say hello to each other without ripping each other's clothes off. Granted that with a new relationship sex happens more often, but the reader doesn't have to read every single one - and I'm of the opinion that after the initial sex, the only sex scenes necessary are ones which progress the plot.
When I find myself saying "NOT AGAIN!" and skimming forward to find out what happens in the story next, then I know that there's too much sex and for me the author has wasted their time and effort.
When the use of animal imagery - espcially cat/tiger imagery - is over done. If one isn't feline and purring, then the other is often prowling and growling.
Yes, you are right. There are size queens in every gender and genre but what drives me nuts is when every character in a given story/series being so blessed. Because, really how often do you find a groups of friends/acquaintances where all men are over 10" or whatever...
So true. It's got to be code. Like blue -- er, sapphire -- eyes. One of those popular romantic conventions that quickly becomes hackneyed.
Sure, a lot of fans of m/m like the smutty scenes, and I'm not excluded, but that doesn't mean you have to dumb down your plot and writing to just get more reviews/comments/etc. Or worse, feel like the only way you'll get comments is by adding smut.
That was one of the surprises to me in writing romance -- that books were actually "graded" on hotness factor. I mean these are not reviews or reviewers whose ratings I'm agonizing over, but it was a...curiosity.
When I find myself saying "NOT AGAIN!" and skimming forward to find out what happens in the story next, then I know that there's too much sex and for me the author has wasted their time and effort.
And the funniest part about this is that if the sex is used more sparingly -- if it's attached to a great story -- then those scenes actually have more impact. They are...sexier.
When the use of animal imagery - espcially cat/tiger imagery - is over done. If one isn't feline and purring, then the other is often prowling and growling.
YES. Oh my God, so funny.
once again I missed this!!! I'm not paying enough attention. Ahem. We'll leave those tears for now.
But my biggest pet peeve is cocks filling up. When you're reading a story about a guy playing billiards and a man walks in and the billiards guy gives him the once over and his cock fills up.
I've never once responded to a first glance at someone with my...er...ladybits. I swear when I read this my face drains of blood.
My pet peeves are when the women (if there are any) in a MM story are either portrayed as poor creatures who were oblivious to their man being gay or who come off as victims.
As for the size issues, I'm a monster lover and have to actively prevent myself from going into 'Legend of the Overfiend'-sized lengths and widths anyway. Its all fantasy to me.
As a reader, I'll say that yes, I've shaken my head at a few annoying story elements. As an author with peers guilty of said annoying elements, I'll leave it at that. I'm sure I've annoyed a few of them, too. ;)
But my biggest pet peeve is cocks filling up. When you're reading a story about a guy playing billiards and a man walks in and the billiards guy gives him the once over and his cock fills up.
I've never once responded to a first glance at someone with my...er...ladybits. I swear when I read this my face drains of blood.
I know. I know. Oh god I know. This is one of my pet peeves too.
Nikki said-- yes. And I'd have to add Pointless Drama to this list. I will say, though that I'm okay with small town douchebag racist cops. I've met enough of them in real life, I suppose.
I second that. I second both of them, actually. It's just...I see too many writers reaching for cliches instead of their own characterizations.
Pointless drama -- or what too often passes for conflict in M/M romance.
My pet peeves are when the women (if there are any) in a MM story are either portrayed as poor creatures who were oblivious to their man being gay or who come off as victims.
Yes. I agree. I like strong characters all around. Not flawless characters, but...interesting characters -- and a variety of personalities.
Too often women are the villains or mother goddesses in M/M -- how about...just ordinary people with strengths and weaknesses like in real life?
As for the size issues, I'm a monster lover and have to actively prevent myself from going into 'Legend of the Overfiend'-sized lengths and widths anyway. Its all fantasy to me.
Hey, whatever amuses.
As a reader, I'll say that yes, I've shaken my head at a few annoying story elements. As an author with peers guilty of said annoying elements, I'll leave it at that. I'm sure I've annoyed a few of them, too. ;)
Very diplomatic. *g*
I've never once responded to a first glance at someone with my...er...ladybits. I swear when I read this my face drains of blood.
Males are more visually oriented than women and can respond more, shall we say, dramatically to the sight of a sexy, attractive person than we girlies do. With that being said, none of my male associates have reported an instant all-out erection when sighting hot property, but they do report the stirrings of arousal and so I have mentioned that "faint stirring". So I'll agree that the instant woody is a bit much, but apparently it's accurate to allude to a "stirring/twitching/etc" of the manbits. Gosh, the boys sure do have a time of it, eh? LOL
1. Overly schmaltzy characters - both in word and deed.
2. Gulping down semen like it's a Frosty on the 4th of July.
3. Out of the realm of possibility sexual positions. Baby, it just don't bend that way.
OMG hilarious: ...not everybody is out to kill a twink.
Though in reference to my dislike of overly schmaltzy characters ... the flip-side is a character avoiding anything that remotely resembles a feeling. I don't mind a sensitive character - god knows there are enough incredibly sensitive men in real life.
It seems a fine line for some authors between achieving whiney cry-baby --> normal <-- needs agression therapy.
What really bores me is the trend in M/M books now to make 50% of them menages. All of a sudden everywhere I turn it seems that gay couples have become bi and must have a woman in the mix to 'complete' them. She's either their old softball buddy or best friend or whatever.
Apparently menages are where it's at now in the industry. So many gay men are becoming bisexual for that one woman. How quaint!
Apparently menages are where it's at now in the industry. So many gay men are becoming bisexual for that one woman. How quaint!
This is the fantasy of several friends I asked about it. A menage with two gay men. But yes, its boring to read the same kind of story all over again and not very realistic to asume two gay guys are in need of a girl, why should they??
Navel gazing about feelings. Male characters that seem more like women and lack of chemistry.
Well, I don't know if anybody still reads this thread, but in case someone does: what I think is really the most ridiculous thing in m/m romance (apart and maybe even above the worthy pet peeves already mentioned) is a character dynamic that so doesn't work even in heterosexual romance where it is also much employed.it's the 'strong man'/'eager to be rescued woman' theme. it's one of the reasons I don't read 'straight' romance, so I'm really annoyed if it follows me into m/m. I once honest to god read a book where the main character proudly (!) tells his mother that his new lover takes such good care of him that he (the lover) has thrown out all his (the character's) coffee and replaced it with decaf because coffee isn't good for our boy. I don't really want to think about what I would do to someone who cleared out my kitchen in my best interest. But there you go.
My second biggest pet peeve is everybody in a book having chiselled abs and sculpted pecs, esp. when these muscles are supposed to be the result not of the gym but of physical labor. Honeys, let's face this: Chiselled abs and sculpted pecs and other blown up muscles are the product of a workout designed to produce them. People who really work hard physically develop a different sort of body. Also beautiful but less 'perfect' in this generic sort of way.
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